One day I was complaining to someone about my 6 year old daughter - her stubbornness, inability to make a decision, some eating issues, some other stuff I can't recall at the moment. This person asked if I had any of these issues as a child. I had to answer truthfully, well, YES! They just looked at me with a grin on their face. I blushed and felt really stupid. I realized I am dealing with me - it's payback time.
My poor parents. I was the youngest (as is my daughter) and my parents were older when they had me (I'm even older). There are too many parallels to list here. The biggest difference is that she's homeschooled and I should have been. So maybe with that difference in her life, she has a chance to overcome some of those issues that I might have developed from being sent away every day when I really wanted to be at home. Who knows? I hope so. I absolutely hated eating lunch at school and went home to eat as often as I could. At 10, I went through a time where I refused to go back to school after lunch. No one knew what to do with me. Ignore it, it'll go away. I remember in 2nd grade, I went to the nurse's station nearly every day for awhile with a stomachache. I'd lay down for awhile and then go back to class. I clearly recall counting the dots in the ceiling tiles (remember those awful white porous squares that hung up there? It always bugged me that the dots weren't in straight rows, but randomly spaced. I digress ...) One day, I came back to class and there were a bunch of "get well" cards on my desk - my sweet teacher had the class make them for me. I'll never forget that. I think she was trying to help me, probably guessing that the stomach aches were from stress.
Stress from having to go to school every day is something, I pray, that my daughter will never face. No, her stress will come from an over-anxious mother, if I'm not careful. I need to let her be and make her own decisions - decisions that I don't need to make for her. You know, stuff that's not all that important. It's so hard, though. If I don't remind her to go to the bathroom, she'll literally not go for hours. I know this is not healthy, especially after you've been asleep all night. So what do I do? Continue to remind her or let her deal with the consequences? I know this all sounds so trivial but when you live with it all day long, it gets tedious. My new doctor said I need to get away for a break. Maybe a day or so without all the little daily worries would help bring a better perspective to my life as a mom, teacher, wife, assorted other hats.
How about some suggestions? Do you take a break from time to time? What do you do? I'd love to hear it.